ओने थिंग अबाउट.....

those friends,
are sharks
or mountain lions

freinds
dont make your bed
or do spell check

friends fucking tell you to fuck off

their there
when ya need
not just because ya bleed

cuz everybody bleeds dont they

maybe i pushed a wrong button
maybe that button got pressed
and stuck on
like caps lock

maybe the VOICES
arent about you
egomaniac

maybe that black man
was about somebody
maybe that somebody wasnt you

but why do i see a black man right now
coming in and out of the door

shit it aint about me.
see
did my hiers give me some bad blood

always thouht i was in the clear
always thought
i could trust up here
what ya see what ya hear

who doubts
Ibetter.

HH..IM OK
mucho LOVE
SK...if ya ever get to these parts
Love to u.
MEM.....TRAIN

इन इंग्लिश please

finally just another day
whoever
whatever
was a motherfing chemical

kurt said it
man
i found my friends
their in my head

i began to trust them
they helped me pack
they moved things
they hacked my computer

now heres the christmas miracle
they said....lets give 'em the xmas miracle of his life
lets let him be

so he can breathe

वाकी वाकी

voices are voices
aounds be they what they may

godamn unconscious makes a loveley sweater before i even wake.

ive heard them knit.

waiting till every eye is shut..one by oneee,,, unnnnnn (radiohead Rainbows track 2 has gotten me thru,,,

someone said..theyl go away but theyll come back.....i said u dont understand...

how does ome put to paranoia pdf intellectual property dissapearing nowhere to be found.....pdf cheap sandwiches,,,,,
..next day as if ive a brand fucking new emac out of the box,,,,

all the time a running commentary.....a couple......."oh what a nice christmas presant"..so
saw my dr said wtf man i got same GD vehicles followin....i do reverse pursuit thaere out of there.....

so i tale a blue capsule..knocks me for a loop of sundays,,,just enough to really send me into black whole.

google "survelliance"
1st result
usually done by private or businesses interested in intellectual property.
and in a manner as to be obvious, but in such a way the victim will supress it....


exaactafuckingly what ive been doing not dinner talk not talk talk
its commital talk,
99.9999999.0000000000000j7887775454454754545468......- one person
boohhhhhhhhhhhh
too much literature on mind control false voice
skitzo aising investigations

livinm in a fish bowl
makea me a pretty fish

look

i reminice the blues
of isolation
look back to my worst depression as if
it were lake tahoe
cuz aint nobody know
when theres nowhere u can go


whan 2 plus 3
wont ever add up
and u see
and see
and see
but life must go on



anxiety
needs to be a word
for drivers

what i dont allow
myself to feel is the fear
of his face
as he walked past

two hard cold
serious as the sky falling
that man looked at me

what can i do

where do i turn

does it matter

why me
what do they want
what did someone see in me
or is it about me

id be crazy if i told u
id be crazy if i didnt lie to myself each morning

.....

walk ...
taxi cab
waitin
for?
will i ever
look at a cellphone the same\

trauma
will this lead to a future that
is a hell on earth
have I lost my ability\
to even assimilate information

is this skitzophrenia
enviromentally produced

i never thought in a million years

not in a trillion

so i meditate
their always there
and thats
fact jack

lights off
but someones always home
awake watching

whisper

life will never be the same

so
alone
does annyone care
each mourning
is this the day

will i be another
person,
lone lone lone
never
alone
but never
never alone
sick
or aware
cuz im aware
and
i can add
what stupid ass
thing jas
caused this
unthinkable reaction

i long to be alone
just to know

b4 i wanted attention
tricks
nighttime
ninjas

if ever
a miracle
be
know its not me.

LIFE
MIStakes
can put u in a nightmeare

one can be too spaced
and hes tied down
im guessing

स्नो एंड थे devil

above me
paces
racecars
semicircles
speakers
tvs
alien shit

psycho in a laundrymat
all to true
when your stuck
black man
agent?
why?

do i want to know

i stumble

trip on the damn goldmine

i leave it

cuzz

i figure

everyones got a job

sunny day

here i sit...hours its been\
they whisper what the fuck
he must be on drugs
i sawe him take pills out of his bag.....and i mentioned i talked w/o beeing talked टी
ओम्ग इमागिने तो many clicks to many pricks the surface of communication of respect of beeing liked....one must go thru social bootcamp........no compliment no actions no words

its unfair

to people w money
i need not open my mouth
im seen as a punkpoor thief im watched
tho ive never stolen never ever,,,,,i pay parking crimes
i stop for pedestriams
r escue seagulls,,,,,help the down and out'



but why do they all assume,,if i shop too l ong \
why are they rude ...when im nice




ever been nice and be treated cold as ice
and the person bhind u gets a smile\\\


is thier a billboard telling lies

why has my reputation been destroyed
before ive had a chance to show who i am what im capable of




i didnt decide to be pooru didnt need to say yes when i asked to use the computea






















but u resent your innability to be firm


so many are just so scared to say what their thinking...
so why treat me wierd cuz im not araid to say it and i dont care who hears it
\\\\


u may think im a drug dealerr
\u make think im a thief


\\

\\]u may watch me with your video eyes
and your wired windowsikll eyes



u may see me wash my balls u may see me
looking out my window



u may see that i see a girl/


u may think you are holy you ,may think your alone but are u


u can never know me by watching nme



noone is ever whpo they are whenm thier not alone


kilkll me cuff me.....but when u take my privacy

my goals my future is nill
cuz i just dont cvare annbymore
i dont care cuz of how u treat me how u lie to me]
hide in the shadows
the play of the centurt\\



create my mental illness
create doubt.....create a thief


im not a thief



im not a junkie or a perve


uve no right to watch me


ive every right to make sure you dont


your going to die someday


i hope ur judged


ill be responsible for my life


will u

metaphor: gun go off.
start the race.
& given our orders' what has our city given us to do next..
fantasy.....reality
writting
perspective
never given
meant
for
unique
interpretation

one loafs
one is awoken
one is on a path of totality
one is in infancy of the marvels.
my life....those around....so much to be known.....beyond any pleasure
....beyond any act or reaction...
my cousin is gone.
she had a short life however she tried harder than any ll know
if I can try...if I can break free, if I don't know limitations....
know know hate can live in me
know my words are my fortress
what are all I have....but words can decieve.....
is a book ever percieved ....yes
have ...ok nothings the same
u see me but u will never
I'm saddened u sift the dark & which u feast...look to the light
its there.
question every thought.....motive? bias?
my life ..... I am human and I've a heart.

the city brought darkness, swirling shadows caught listless souls
down into her dephths.
but a second to feel the life.
an aroma perhaps or a glimpse of another life in perhaps the same
life-time in which u live....
surfing giant waves are our destinies....this city isn't for the
listless....its hard beyond any name or namesake...to be caught in its
tidal wave is to fight for the surface for that breath of air that
isn't free...the city has a place for any soul...stake your ground,
see its habits watch her ...never see too much kindness ...shell steal
that...from your very soul...the time has come where my mind has come
to the line.
will the gun go off tonight?
when shall we be given our orders.
uve begun...theres no quitting this
cuz the city won't let any be drugged dragged under her for
long....live ...live...time is now...to be and feel..face fear in its
place....dont placate....
if it be you ...they shall try to see
better go on beeing...
if ya don't know even who...ya are....just smile....be kind....let em
see there's a sun & redemption comes in all flavors....
but live.
live I shall.