stupa drunk

around when we got sick of the cops thunderinh " I know the guns in here" between the roaches and pissy warm shower & a barefoot bang......between 5am turkey dinner take-outs...& .025 cent cookies sustaininhg.....we moved out of the casa loma thougjt of &s house of dirt- mark slept in violet (my gf's truck) I remember moving him....snickering at t e insanity of it all.....,around that time...Id been making trips to Berkeley to the Nyingma INT w/ the hopes of beeing sent North to Odiyon...rigorous testing of will& physical mental condition -overall motivation for the 6 month committment....

how would I have guessed my future.. from a sacred high 2....walking into 5oo fillmore w/ blue chelsae pete sistar cozmos august mark and I....what a crowd.
chelsae OD'd. we all woke to petes screaming.. It was alien to me than... blue& chelsae were very ok beeing half naked.....and I a too shy boy....once was askedif blues right or left breast was bigger....I locked myseld in our room....Than The famous boy on boy lover real man fight....& the tarot cards that combusted.....
,Mark left to visit the E coast. Aug met thiz pierced NY guy who turned him on. I'd stay & watch at his request....Nirvanna came out w/ teen spirit the lyrics fit my broken heart...it was so new....august was much more social...I went along to parties but always afraid to meet My anxiety was at the cofee shop , on our walks to art stores...mark called me peroshski ..we always got one at the coener...wedvisoliver sometimes...i wish I'd stayed on track w/ the free radical feeling I got their....but I never fealt good...
eventually the chaos got me a rented closet in a large and haunted home.....mark went to live w/ a friend from noc noc.....man that bar was the place....met cheryl there....fell deep for her so old I thought at 27......
soon I would party smoking black tar...w/owen a rich artist from santa-barbara. I was 19. it was 1992....
end here 2 nite..
maybe we don't live in past
but why not write it.